Eric was working on his sermon about the enemy within, meaning a person's worst enemy is themself.  Mary's new boyfriend, airplane Capt. Ken Smith showed up at the house and angrily told Eric and Annie that Mary seduced his son.  He threatened to put up businesses around Eric's church that would send parishoners away.  Ben and Kevin came in to ask permission to take the twins on a walk and Ben told Ken all about Mary's old boyfriends and not to be worried about Mary's relationship with Jack lasting long.  When he went to leave, he couldn't find his hat.  He asked the twins if they had the hat and they said no.  The Camden's hunted around the house for the hat.  (Side note, you can see the twins stealing the hat in the background right after they run out.)  Ken finally came back later and asked if his hat had been found.  He apologized to Eric.  He said that Mary and Jack had broken up.  Eric was excited that Mary had broken up with Jack and went to tell Annie who was excited too.  They sang and danced.  The hat was finally found on one of the twins when Sam pulled it out from his pants.

At school, Cecilia told him that everyone thinks Claire is pregnant and that Simon got her pregnant since he had taken her out when he was running his escort service.  Simon finally approached Claire and said he wanted to help her.  Claire tried to deny she was pregnant then explained she couldn't be because her dad would literally kill her and probably her mom too.  Simon showed up at the police station to ask Kevin for some help, but Det. Michaels sent Kevin and Roxanne to Ruthie's school before he could listen to Simon.  Roxanne told Simon that if it was about a woman, Kevin might not be the best person to ask.  After she left, Det. Michaels approached Simon and Simon said it was a class project to find out about the program where a person could drop a baby off at a hospital without questions asked.  Det. Michaels was suspicous that it wasn't a class project and told Simon that in California, all a person has to do is take a baby to an emergency room, fire station or police station and there will be no questions asked.  Claire called the Camden house and talked to Annie who handed her over to Simon when he walked in the door.  She asked Simon for good news.  That night, Simon hung out in his room with all the phones waiting for Claire to call.  She finally called and told Simon she was leaving the baby in a phone booth for him to find.  Simon sat outside the hospital in his car with the baby, crying, before finally going in to give the baby to a nurse who came out to meet him.  Unknown to him, Det. Michaels was watching.

Ben read Lucy's journal.  Lucy walked into her room to find Ben asleep on her bed with her open journal on his chest and got angry.  Ben told Kevin what she had written about him.  When Lucy talked to Kevin about it, he said he didn't keep a journal because he told Lucy everything he's thinking.  She then asked Kevin if he ever slept with anyone and Kevin refused to answer.  When he came home he told Lucy he would love her even if she'd been with another man.  Lucy said that wouldn't work because she hadn't and he told her that was personal information that he didn't need to know.  Lucy finally went to the den to tell her dad goodnight and that she was giving up trying to find out if Kevin had ever been with a woman.  Eric was shocked that Lucy would make that an issue.

At school, a girl named Linda teased Ruthie by calling her Monkey Lover.  Ruthie tried to explain that Eisenhower was a chimpanzee, not a monkey but Linda wasn't interested.  Jake showed up and stood up for her, saying he was Ruthie's real boyfriend.  He told Linda not to call her Monkey Lover or else Ruthie would punch her.  Ruthie told Linda she wasn't worth punching and walked away.  Ben showed up to pick Lucy up from school.  Linda showed up and called Ben a big ape.  Ben then told her to watch who he was calling names and a Vice Principal came out asking what was going on.  Linda pretended to get upset and lied that Ben threatened her and called her a munchkin.  Ben explained he was picking up Ruthie and Linda said she thought he was lying and the Vice Principal said she would have to call the police.  While waiting for the police, she tried calling the Camden's but the phone line was constantly busy as Robbie was on the phone with Mary.   Kevin and Roxanne finally showed up at the time when Annie called the school and all checked out okay.  After Ben and Ruthie finally showed up at home that night, Ben said he was definitely going back to Buffalo.